Life alone can be challenging, but when you throw transition into the mix the challenge gets a tad more complicated. Transition isn’t easy no matter what anyone says. Never determine whether someone has an easy transition or not based on what you see or hear about the person. Instead listen to them and hear their story of transition because even though the outer appearance of their transition might look easy does not mean they didn’t or don’t have battles they fought along the way. Just remember we all have a different journey and fight different battles.
A little update on my journey and where I am at in my transition. My life journey hasn’t been easy so far as I stated in my very first post and coming out each time was difficult. Since that post I have come out at work which was something I was extremely scared and nervous about because you never know what people’s beliefs or reactions will be. I have had nothing but, good responses so far on the work front. I currently work in the public sector which made it a little more tedious for me to come out. They changed my name badge, my email, and have continuously called me Kayden and used he/him pronouns. Of course every now and than they mess it up, but its the effort to me that counts. I know this isn’t an easy part of everyone’s transition so I am definitely not downgrading what it takes to go through this part of everyone’s transition. For me personally it has been an easy process so far and I hope that as I encounter more people that work for the City they have the same understanding as my immediate coworkers.
As you know I have not started hormones, but have my first appointment with the endocrinologist on the 16th of June to get my first shot. I am so excited to start my medical transition and know that along with that their will be some trials and tribulations. Over the years I have done my fair share of research on hormone therapy and what can or may happen along the way. Of course I think like most of us there are things I am not looking forward to and some other things I am super excited about. The day after I get my first shot I go on a ten day vacation so I sure hope I don’t have any strange side effects from my first or second shot. If anyone who has used hormones and has had a reaction if you could please leave a comment below and let me know what it was I’d appreciate it.
Another part of my transition that has changed is how my grandparents are slowly starting to come around. My grandmother is a diabetic and gets sharp containers all the time at a place that is in town. My grandfather was going out there to get her some and I asked if he could pick me one up while he was out there. To my surprise he did and I was very thankful and hopeful for what is to come. They still use my birth name and she/her pronouns, but they know I start hormones soon and are easier to talk to about my transition now that it has been a while since they found out. I wasn’t really sure they would ever start to come around in any way what so ever. I thought they would forever stay in their denial world, but we recently had a conversation that once I start growing a beard and looking more masculine that they are going to look stupid if they call me my birth name and use she/her pronouns while we are out in public. My grandfather said he wouldn’t use them out in public at that time. I feel like this is a good first step for them and because I don’t want to ruin the amazing relationship I have with my grandparents they are the only ones I allow to continue to call me my birth name or use she/her pronouns. I know most people would probably say, but it’s your life and you should be called what you want to be called. I agree with you, but when it comes to my grandparents I am more lenient and willing to compromise for the sake of our relationship. Another positive note on the grandparent front is that my grandma is going to go to her first support group with my partner in July. This makes me hopeful that by hearing from other family members that shes not the only one out there that has a transgender grandchild or child.
One part of my transition that is still far away, but am looking forward to is top surgery. I decided to start a gofundme page to try and get my friends and family to help with freeing me to be me. I know we are all saving for something in our transition and mine right now happens to be for top surgery. If anyone else has advice on how to save for top surgery let me know. Of course I put money away each paycheck for it, but I am always up to hearing new ways to earn money and save it. I know this post wasn’t on a specific topic it was really just an update on my transition so far. Obviously once I start T I will have a ton more to talk about in regards to my transition. I appreciate all the support I receive from you all! Stay tuned for more topic post to come.